I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
She even gives head with a lisp.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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