can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
