This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize
