tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
