really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
