Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
