lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
she looked like the before picture.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
