i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
wow bdsm is so cute
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
