i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
