I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
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