i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
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