I puked a lego.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
i out mim tonsoeep
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