so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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