Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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