CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
