her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
