Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
