i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize