So drunk its hurt
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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