All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Randomize
