Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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