We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
