Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
