He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
