They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
