i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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