At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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