Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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