Fuck appropriateness.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
