all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
the day after is always just damage control
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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