I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
