my phone needs a breathalizer
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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