8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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