this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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