i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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