Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
