1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
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