Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
