OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize