Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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