i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
