needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize
