Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Is it because I queefed?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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