I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
my liver is dry heaving
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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