nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
