you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
