He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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