i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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