Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
