I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
