They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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