I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
